All Things Change
by Kretari - daughter of Hermes
Summary: Matthew hates being ignored. His own family doesn't even notice him. He knows that he shouldn't be surprised, but it doesn't keep it from hurting. When his only true life line is his boyfriend, Gilbert, he shouldn't be surprised to have to answer questions about what happened the next time they meet up at school. *Human AU/High School AU* *Trigger warning: mentions self harm*
1. Chapter 1

**AN: Oh gods... Sorry, guys. Crappy evening for me. Feels. Many, many feels. I apologize. But it was this or hurting myself. It's not like I won't regret both later on once it all sinks in. **

**Enjoy?**

_All I want is for you to notice me.._ Matthew thought as he watched his family from the midway point of the stairs. He had stopped on the way up to his room and glanced back, his first mistake.

He loved them, he honestly did. But they didn't notice him. He could be gone and they wouldn't notice, he bet.

At that thought, his eyes finally teared up and he dashed the rest of the way up the stairs to his room. He got his phone out, leaning against the door, and shakily dialed a number he knew by heart by now, putting the device that was acting as his main lifeline in that moment to his ear.

"Please pick up..."he whispered as the tears fell. He didn't know what he would do if he didn't get an answer.

Just as that thought entered his mind, the sound of his boyfriend's voice filtered through the speaker. But, Matthew realized with a soft sob, it was only his voicemail.

"_Hallo. You've reached the awesome Gilbert. Leave a message, ja?"_

Matthew didn't wait for the tone, he hung up and slid down the door to where he was sitting against it.

Things didn't settle much after that for Matthew. He had to manage a whole weekend with his family.

First thing Monday when they got back to school, Gilbert found the Canadian curled in on himself outside in the cool autumn morning air. The Prussian grinned and moved to wrap his arms around Matthew from behind, but he was pushed away.

"Mattie? What's wrong?"Gilbert asked once it sunk in that something was really the matter with his boyfriend, who was normally very happy to see him.

Matthew shook his head silently, glancing down at the ground.

Gilbert did a quick sweeping glance of his boyfriend. It was enough for him to notice the way that Matthew held the ends of his jacket sleeves in a death grip, the fact that his eyes were swollen and dull and that he was having to bite at his lower lip to keep it from trembling.

"Matthew.."Gilbert said. "What happened?"

Matthew let out a low sob and shook his head.

Gilbert frowned in concern. He had never once scene Matthew cry, never break. He moved to draw him into a gentle hug and this time met no resistance. "It was your family again, wasn't it? They started ignoring you again, huh?"  
Matthew nodded weakly.

"Why didn't you call?"

Matthew gave a bitter laugh through his tears. "I did."he mumbled. "You didn't answer. Again."

Gilbert sighed. "I'm sorry."he said quietly. Then something finally clicked. "Mattie, let me see your arms."

Matthew shook his head, moving from the hug that Gilbert had him wrapped in.

Gilbert gave him a look. "Le'me see."he said again.

Matthew gave him a searching glance before he huffed, but he made no move to wipe the tears away or push his sleeves up.

Instead, Gilbert reached over and pulled his sleeves up. He sighed when he saw the angry red marks. "This has to stop somehow.."he mumbled. "You'll end up killing yourself one of these days."

"And?"Matthew asked. "Not like anyone would notice or care."

Gilbert glowered. "Excuse you."he said in response. "I would. I care about you. Mattie, I love you, you know this."

Matthew met his eyes and finally reached up to dry his eyes. "Really..? You mean it..?"  
Gilbert gave him a soft smile in return. "Of course I mean it."he said in response. "Ich liebe dich."

Matthew managed a soft smile for the first time within the last several days. "Je t'aime."he said in response.  
"Good."Gilbert said softly, grinning. He leaned down and stole a soft kiss before he pulled back and grabbed Matthew's hands. "Now...next thing...this?"he added, holding Matthew's hands up so that Matthew himself could see the cuts. "It can't happen again. I don't like seeing you hurt, Birdie."

Matthew nodded. "I know. I'm sorry."

Gilbert shrugged. "That's okay. I get it."he mumbled before kissing the cuts softly.

Matthew laughed quietly. "What are you doing?"  
Gilbert smiled up at Matthew. "An old tradition I have with Ludwig..if he got hurt as a kid, I'd kiss the would to make sure he knew he was loved no matter what. I'm going to do the same. Besides...the scars that will show up once these heal? Battle scars. Everyone has some, in some way."

Matthew smiled faintly. "You are such an idiot sometimes."

Gilbert shrugged. "I'm your idiot, though."

**So...here. **


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey guys. Here's a new chapter for you guys. I really like writing things like this...oddly. Because it's like therapy. And I need that. I had to throw my blade away..so I need something to give me a bit of...I dunno..peace? So I don't go insane. **

**Enjoy.**

After that, Gilbert made Matthew promise not to cut again if he could help it. But he could tell that Matthew had hesitated, not sure if he could manage it. He couldn't blame him, honestly. With how his family treated him sometimes? It was understandable in a terrible way.

Matthew did manage to keep his promise for a good while, Gilbert noticed. It did surprise him, considering everything that Matthew was constantly put through.

However, one night about two months later, once it was getting a lot colder out, he got a call at about one from Matthew. He blinked at his phone for a moment before he answered. "Birdie? What's going on?"he asked curiously.

The soft sound of sobs is what Gilbert heard for the next second. He shot up in his bed, alarmed. "Are you _okay_?"he asked.

"Gil..I'm sorry.."Matthew said softly.

Gilbert's eyes widened before they softened. "Oh...what happened? Actually, no forget that. I'm on my way. Open your window,"he said. "And don't hang up. Stay on the phone with me until I get there."

Matthew gave a shaky 'okay' in response, but said nothing more.

Gilbert got up, quickly setting the phone down so he could do a quick change and throw some shoes on before he grabbed his phone and headed out in silence, taking care not to alert anyone else to the fact that he was leaving.

Once he got to Matthew's house, he spoke softly. "You okay?"he asked. "I'm outside.."

Matthew gave a shaky breath and hung up.

That gave Gilbert his answer, hanging his own phone up and putting it away, going about getting up to Matthew's room without waking anyone.

Once he managed, it was to see Matthew curled up against his bed. He could see the blood that had found it's way into his clothes and the tears that were still falling heavily down his cheeks.

Gilbert automatically moved to his side, pulling him into a tight hug. "What happened?"he asked softly.

Matthew threw a look to the door of his room, and it gave Gilbert his answer. Gilbert gave a huff of anger towards Matthew's family before he returned his focus to Matthew himself.

"Listen to me, Mattie."he said softly. "Stop letting them get to you so much. If they're going to ignore you, they aren't worth your time anyways."

Matthew nodded, but Gilbert could tell he was trying to convince himself of that afterwards.

After a few seconds, Gilbert let go and got up to get the first aid kit that Matthew kept hid in the top of his closet before setting about stopping the blood flow and doctoring his wrist.

When he finished, Matthew had calmed remarkably, and spoke. "Thank you, Gil."he murmured.

Gilbert nodded. "No problem, Mattie."he replied quietly. "C'mon, you need some rest."

"But...Al always makes sure I'm awake..."

Gilbert shook his head, getting up and locking Matthew's door before he moved to pull Matthew up. "Not in the morning."he said. "I'll make sure to wake you."

Matthew hestiated, but agreed and allowed Gilbert to pull him back into bed.

That was how Matthew fell asleep, his head laying over Gilbert's heart and his arms curled around the Prussian.

Gilbert did doze a bit , his arms wrapped around Matthew's waist.

He woke up about twenty minutes before Matthew had to get up and smiled down at the sleeping Canadian. He seemed much more at peace now.

When it was time for him to get up, Gilbert spoke softly. "Birdie, wake up, liebe."he said quietly.  
Matthew blinked his eyes open, glancing at him. "Hm..?"he murmured, cuddling closer and settling back down.

Gilbert smiled faintly. "Get up. I gotta go, and you gotta get ready for school,"

Matthew groaned, but sighed, pushing himself up. He smiled faintly at Gilbert, stealing a kiss before he got up. "Get going. Be careful."

Gilbert nodded and quickly got up, disappearing again.

When they met up at school later, Gilbert gave him a look. "Feeling any better, Matthew?"he asked softly, wrapping his arms around the Canadian.

Matthew smiled. "Yeah, I am. Thanks to you."he commented.

Gilbert grinned. "Good."he murmured.

**Here ya go.**


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Hey, guys! So...here's the new chapter. I...we're working on this...final thing in Chorus, and I got to talking with a friend of mine that I'm singing it with..and well...this is kind of a result of us sharing meanings of the song we're doing - Those Nights by Skillet. Then it evolved into a lot of other stuff - we talked about The Last Night as well. Which is where this comes from. This is what happened to cause it, just letting you know.**

**To those who reviewed: **

**LadyKlamydia: Glad you like it! And hey, if you're insane, join the party! So am I! That is true, for sure. **

**Gwendolyn.D'Agostino: Thanks! Working on it!**

**Ramengirl: Glad we share that sentiment for the pairing. Glad you seem to like the story.**

**Enjoy.**

After that, things settled down quite a bit again. It was a nice change for them, since Matthew had been so...uneasy..lately. They just weren't used to dealing with things like this. They were better at being a light-hearted couple, complete opposites yet so alike at the same time. It still surprised people that the two of them were together.

Gilbert was careful not to let anyone know about Matthew's cutting, and he kept a close eye on Matthew, making sure he was okay.

As such, when Matthew came out to the patio outside where they had lunch and collapsed against him, Gilbert frowned and wrapped his arms around him. "Are you alright, Birdie?"  
Matthew shook his head. "Al knows. He finally started paying attention to me again. He saw my arm.."he said, voice showing that he was panicking.

Gilbert sighed. "Is he going to tell your parents?"

"I don't know."Matthew responded.

"Well..whatever happens, I'm here for you. If you need away, you can come stay with me for a few days,"

Matthew glanced up and gave him a thankful, shaky smile. "Merci, Gil..."he murmured.

Gilbert smiled softly, stealing a quick kiss. "How about you settle down a bit and eat, huh?"

There wasn't much that Gilbert could do, as he realised later on.

He insisted on walking Matthew home, but Alfred met them at the porch.

Alfred's eyes went to Gilbert and he spoke. "Did you know?"

Gilbert snorted. "Who do you think's been helping him while you and your parents have been outright ignoring him, treating him like he doesn't exist?"he responded coldly, guard up.

Alfred looked down and he nodded. "Right."he said with a sigh. "Listen..thanks for that. But...would you please let us handle it now?"

Matthew took a step back and stared at his older brother. "You told them?"he asked in shock. He hadn't thought he would, admittedly.

Alfred looked at the door before he nodded once again. "I had to, Mattie..they have a right to know."

Matthew shook his head in response. "No they don't! It's none of their damn business, Alfred! It's because of them and you that it started."he said, voice laced with hurt and disbelief.

Alfred looked down before he sighed. "I want to help, that's all.."

"Well don't."Matthew said. "I'm doing good enough without you trying to help."

Gilbert hesitated before he spoke softly. "Listen, don't fight. That'll only make it worse for everyone. Mattie..."

Matthew looked at him before he sighed. "I'll call you later."he promised, leaning up to steal a kiss before he headed inside.

Gilbert looked at Alfred. "If things get bad here because of this, he's coming to stay with me and my brother. And I'll have a bone to pick with you."he warned.

Alfred rolled his eyes. "Got it."he grumbled, turning around and heading in.

Later that evening, while Gilbert was sitting in the living room playing a game while Ludwig sat on the couch reading a book, Feliciano curled up beside him, his phone went off.

Gilbert paused his game, answering the phone. "Hallo."he greeted.

He froze when he got the reply. "Mattie, you okay?"he asked, worried.

Ludwig's eyes went to Gilbert.

Gilbert pinched the bridge of his nose before he looked at Ludwig, who nodded in understanding and went back to his book. "Alright, get you a bag packed and get your school stuff, you're coming to stay here for a while."he said softly. "I'm on my way to get you now."

When he hung up, Feliciano spoke up. "What's wrong?"

Gilbert looked over at Feliciano. "A bunch of drama, is all."he answered, determined to keep Matthew's secret as long as he could. He grabbed the keys as he walked out the door.

When he came back shortly after, Matthew with him, it was obvious to Feliciano and Ludwig that the Canadian was upset.

Feliciano frowned delicately. He knew Matthew, didn't talk with him as often as he should have, but it still hurt to see him upset.

Matthew met his eyes and gave a fake smile.

Ludwig took a moment to examine Matthew, taking in the way that he was clutching his sleeves, the way he was basically curled in on himself, as if he were trying to hold himself together. He understood what was going on then, but said nothing.

Gilbert sighed. He knew Ludwig figured it out, but he also knew that he wouldn't say anything.

Matthew took in his surroundings before he relaxed. He didn't understand it, but he felt safer, more at ease, here than he did at home.

Things were a bit calmer after that.

Matthew watched quietly as Gilbert played a game, and Ludwig and Feliciano returned to what they had been doing before.

At least, up until dinner.

Feliciano shot up and offered to make dinner, gaining soft smiles from everyone else.

"Sure."Ludwig murmured.

Matthew hesitated before he spoke. "May I help?"he asked Feliciano, who perked up and nodded before shooting off to the kitchen.

Matthew smiled faintly and got up, following the hyper Italian.

"They seem to get along well,"Gilbert commented, pausing his game and looking back at Ludwig.

Ludwig nodded in agreement. "They do. It's nice."

Gilbert grinned. "Of course."

After dinner that night, Feliciano headed home and Gilbert pulled Matthew out to lay in the back yard and watch the stars.

Matthew was completely silent, using Gilbert as a pillow of sorts while the Prussian pointed out certain constellations. It was nice, the calm scene that it provided. After a while, Gilbert fell silent and Matthew spoke up. "Gil..?"he asked softly. "Why do you care so much for me?"  
Gilbert gave Matthew a confused look before he spoke. "Because you mean the world to me."he said softly. "I don't have many reasons...just...you're different. And you actually care for others...you need someone who's willing to do that for you too."

Matthew smiled faintly. "I love you.."he murmured.

Gilbert smiled softly. "Love you too,"he replied. "Everything okay now?"

Matthew thought it over for a moment before he nodded. And he wasn't lying. Everything w_as_ okay now.

**Here you go, guys. Took me a while to write this...**


End file.
